Friday 12 December 2008

How to Have a Stress Free Life and Regain Your Self Confidence

Stress is very much the big buzz word of today and has been for many years now. It can destroy self confidence and can very much damage our health. Everybody has at some stage suffered from stress and to a small degree it can be a good thing; keeping us on our toes and helping us to progress rather than stagnate.

So what is stress and how do we cope with the excessiveness of it?

I can give you a personal example which shows that I am still fallible despite all my practicing of self confidence techniques.

Just yesterday I had a job to do that didn’t go according to plan. As a water treatment engineer by day I had a part to fit on a plant in Swindon. I had ordered the part but as this was not a retrofit there was some differences which I had not anticipated. Using my many years of engineering experience I managed to overcome the various difficulties despite not getting away from site until 9.30 in the evening and having to return today to finish; time that wasn’t in the budget for the job. Finishing late last night was not a problem, I have worked those hours before. Finishing late today was a problem; I had to be home by 6.00p.m. in order to look after my two boys whilst my wife went off to work.

The M25 was my source of stress like it has been for thousands of poor souls who use that infamous motorway as a regular commute. Miles and then tens of miles of speed restrictions, delays and stop-start traffic slowly but surely boiled my brain until it exploded with a barrage of cussing and swearing pointed in the direction of the heavens. I would like to point out that I regularly go to church so my reaction is definitely something I am not proud of. This lack of control is not a regular occurrence but with the problems of the last two days it just got on top of me. The fact that I am powerless to control the circumstances that I found my self in and the temporary destruction of self confidence just added to the frustration.

When suffering from stress the resources of the mind get locked up and the creative thoughts that are more likely to help any given stressful situation keep themselves buried deep in the mind.

Lots of work or tasks that have to be completed in a short space of time add greatly to the stress levels as does working under pressure for long periods of time. Under conditions like these the smallest of external influences blows that shortening fuse. The kids playing up or screaming in the background get a taste of our sharp tongue (does it sound like I’ve been there and got the tee-shirt?). Then we feel bad about what we have done and this dampens our self confidence.

The answer to this is what then?

A few little tips for you which after today’s experience perhaps I need to practice a little harder with.

Eliminate as much as possible the bad external influences. Noise, an untidy workspace and bad lighting are just some examples.
Time manage where possible. Not always easy I know particularly when emergencies crop up.
On the back of time management, try not to commit to too many things. This allows much better control over our time.
Exercise regularly. Taking the strain off of the mind and placing it on the body does wonders for the mind. The release can be quite noticeable after a good workout or sporting activity, especially if we’ve won. People who exercise regularly suffer less stress as long as they don’t over do it.
Eat healthily. Plenty of fruit and vegetables and no alcohol (I might have a problem with the alcohol bit).
Cut out smoking. Despite what people say, smoking increases stress levels. It is the way in which people breathe when smoking that causes a temporary relaxed state.
This may seem difficult to comprehend but we, in a round about way, choose to be stressed. This is brought about by our subconscious minds. Training our subconscious minds through visualisation and images of being stress free will soon help us cope with life in a far more relaxed manner.
Laughter is said to be one of life’s best medicines. By finding our chuckle buttons and taking life a little less seriously is one of the greatest ways to keep healthy.
Using relaxation techniques as can be found at www.whitedovebooks.co.uk/index#terryn1 allows as more time in the relaxation zone.

Stress in small doses is actually good for us but in larger quantities can be a serious health problem and damaging to self confidence and that all important positive attitude.

For those that are interested, I was 15 minute late and my wife had gotten one of our neighbours to baby-sit for that brief time. Perhaps I should add a good wife to the list of stress relievers above.

Terry Norrington

www.whitedovebooks.co.uk/index#terryn1

www.getselfconfident.com

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